Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

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Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Wed Oct 02, 2013 4:28 pm

< Wilhelm/Will's ASA >


Basic Information >

Steam Name: Will / Wilhelm / William
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Steam ID: STEAM_0:1:40505188
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Time with Myrder-Gaming: Since the start
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OOC Skill Etiquite (We're looking for specific stinger words here. BE SPECIFIC!):


Experienced Marksman skills / abilities: I've had Markov for a long, long time, nearly a year in fact, and over that time I have actually been honing his skills Icly. He started out as a Dweller, who I intended to become a trader or an engineer, but over time and due to the many conflicts he was dragged into, or participated in, my idea on his character changed and shifted from being a Trader, to being a Stalker. The idea of Roleplaying an old, weathered scavenger just appealed to me, it provides great passive rp, and I enjoy actually feeling useful when it comes to helping others, be it by giving them food or water, to equipment and weaponry, to helping them stay alive and navigate the tunnels. Markov's done it all at least once. He's gone through gun training when he became a 'novice' (And when I mean novice, I mean he had no idea what he was doing at first) Stalker, and continued to get assistance and training from anyone that could possibly help. Be it Ranger, Red, Reich, Dweller, or a fellow Stalker. Once Metro RP died on UEN, I had last left him off in the surface area, meaning that there was an OOC 2 month downtime between when he left the metro, to when he came back to MG's metro. That is a long, long time to be stuck on the surface, I plan on writing out a backstory to this, but the idea is that he spent the 2 months topside surviving by scavenging as best he could, killing any hostile human he met topside, looting the dead, burning through food and filters almost faster than he could acquire them, and through all this time he would be fighting off mutants. The only reason I attribute him to being able to survive for as long as he did, isolated as he was, was due to his Apprentice Ana(Just noticed I'm getting horribly off topic, my bad, I'll cover the rest in IC / OOC on how he obtained the skills.)
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Character Information >


Character name: Markov V. 'Clockwork' Spesivstev
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Skill Acquisition Backstory (Two Para):



Advanced Marksmanship
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Markov aims down the sight of the Zen's old rifle, An ancient, well maintained ISI Galil. He takes a deep breath, the Zen standing behind him, watching with the patience of a Father teaching a newborn child to walk. Markov pulls the trigger, sending a rather long burst of ammunition down towards a target, a roughly hewn outline of a man painted in bright yellow, circles of red pointing out the major vital points. The burst has sprayed haphazardly around the target, a few rounds hitting the target in non-lethal zones, the rest scattering into the wall the target is propped against. Markov swears and lowers the rifle, looking over to the Zen as he hears the old man laugh, "Do not waste ammo, Markov. You need to control your shots, be calm, collected. Pick out your target, pinpoint where you want to hit, and visualize sending the bullet to that exact spot. Do not rush the shots, nor the kill. Now take a deep breath, and lets try again, shall we?"
Markov sighs to himself, nodding, "Yes, Sir." he says, he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, calmly raising the rifle to his shoulder as he opens his eyes, taking aim, he pulls the trigger.

The Bandit's laughter is cut short, the knife clattering from his hand as a burst of red exits the right side of his skull, his corpse clatters to the ground, The dweller before him letting out a startled gasp at the sudden death of his aggressor. He looks around, shaking as he stands, staggering back as a figure steps from the shadows and approaches, a nearby Metro light illuminating the figure's old, dated suit and mask. The dweller steps back, raising his hands in fear as he begins praying to a long dead god, panic rising as the figure approaches. Markov looks down at the man, sighing softly before slinging his rifle, he twists his body, reaching into his backpack and pulling out a small bag consisting of forty bullets, two loaves of bread, three bottles of filtered water, and a packet of anti-radiation pills. He then reaches out, placing the bag in the dweller's outstretched arms before placing a hand on his shoulder and gently turning him back the way Markov came. The dweller, shocked into silence looks down at the bag, then back up at the hooded, masked figure, he mutters out a thank you, tears of relief sliding down his face before he turns, sprinting off into the darkness. Markov smiles beneath his mask, removing the clip in his rifle, he pulls out a military grade round, sliding it into the top of the clip, replacing the bullet he just sent through the bandit's head. He turns, walking down the metro tunnel, chambering the rifle as he walks, vanishing back into the darkness.






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Detailed Description of Skill(One Para):




Advanced Marksmanship skills
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The idea behind this final skill, is that Markov has been around for a decently long time, and has been trained on how to best utilize a ranged weapons abilities and firepower. He'd know where to better focus his shots, where to send them, and the best range and location to send them from. He's been trained to use a decently large array of weapons, be it a pistol or a rifle, Markov can become an effective gunman with it given the time, this would also link up with Markov's preference of Ranged combat over close quarters combat, as he's spent more time honing his marksman skills than he has training himself to fight in CQC.

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Eugh, So I had to re-write this entire goddamn thing because the forum logged me out whilst I wrote it, so the quality has degraded by a disgustingly large amount. Seems I'm losing my touch, so I apologize in advance if any, if not all, of this seems a bit poorly written and idiotic.
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List of Skill Points (IE: Advanced Hand to Hand, Experienced Marksman):
Experienced Marksman

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edit: Yes I removed the two skills I didn't get auth'd for, no reason leaving them up there as a reminder of how god-awful of a writer I am and how terrible my ideas are xD


Last edited by Willhelm on Wed Oct 02, 2013 8:02 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Wed Oct 02, 2013 7:25 pm

Experienced Marksman - Yes, being a surface stalker gives plenty of opportunities for battle experience. Your skill acquisition on the other hand... I disapprove of.
1: Your back story didn't mention you ever hitting the target with the rifle, only the bandit.
2: This is supposed to be a back story about shooting... not looting or charity for that matter.
3: Never at any point is hitting one unsuspecting target with a head shot ever proof of actual skills.
4: Experienced Marksmen will tell you to always squeeze the trigger, never pull it.


Armorer - I'm not convinced of you having any armoring skills.
1: You may be able to teach yourself how to craft items, but you'd be almost instantly drafted by the Red Line.
2: At no point would it ever be a good idea to hammer anything using your knee to brace it.
3:The odds of you having welding equipment would be slim to none, unless you're with a faction.
4: You ripped off the whole yellow 'M' thing from the menu screen of Last Light.


Advanced Hand-to-Hand - Flat out no.
1: You got your ass beat in the first paragraph, there was no offensive capabilities shown at all.
2: I don't know how you can stand stock still, then instantly dash to the side. Maybe if you were in a stance you could do it... maybe.
3: That supposed 'pack' that was coming would have torn you a new one.
4: Unless you can carry the momentum of a punch in an entirely different direction than your moving. Just no.
5: Unless you one punch killed the first Nosalis, it would have recovered and jump at you by the time you got the second one off of you.




NOTE:The whole concept of the Zen stalker is relatively over powered. Him knowing advanced hand-to-hand and how to be an armorer don't add up. He'd of had to have training in the Spetznaz or KGB to use the moves used against you in the combat scene. To be an armorer he'd had to of lived a life as some type of mechanic. Him being an armorer and knowing all of his combat skills are extremely contradictory.

The fact of the matter is... you'd need a whole other application just for the Zen stalker. Almighty characters with that type of background and skill just don't appear out of thin air.

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Wed Oct 02, 2013 7:53 pm

I will say this before typing the rest of this: This is my opinion. I am very strict with applications, but I am not in charge of them. I am absolutely terrible at writing applications, yes, but I know how to judge them in my own way. I'm sorry if it sounds means or anything of the like, but honestly: Buck up.

Hand-to-hand: Your backstory did not show a reasonable skill or ability. I'm not entirely sure of your real experience, but your second paragraph was unrealistic. I find it extremely suspicious that your character was trained by this Zen Stalker, who is apparently a master of everything.

Armorer: No. The fact that you used your knee as a brace, for one. A, that would take far too long and bring anyone far too much pain. B, the amount of force you'd use to hammer it would most likely bust your knee cap into pieces by the time you were done. I bring up again the Zen Stalker who teaches you everything. Even if he is in your backstory, it's a very unimaginative way to achieve the skills. Also the fact that if you had that skill, you'd mostly likely be sought after by factions if you visited their stations. They'd ask "Where did you get that suit? It's brilliant!", "Oh, I made/found it.", "Come with us!" (Obviously shortened and exaggerated, but you get the point.)

Marksmanship: Again, the Zen Stalker. The backstory was you being trained, but then it was a bullet shot to a bandit's head that was the only thing referencing your skill.

The OOC skill etiquette was alright, but the rest of it is not great and I don't approve of characters being able to manufacture OOC items from IC items anyways. it's always abused in one way or another, indirectly or directly.

I probably missed a bunch of things. Blame RP on the server.

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Wed Oct 02, 2013 7:56 pm

-shrug-

Didn't think I wrote it out very well, to be honest, and Im totally fine with not getting armorer, or the hand to hand. Guns work equally fine as does buying my own gear. And OFC I ripped the M think from the front, are you saying You -cant- use the games / books to inspire ones stories?

Either way, Im fine with getting those revoked.

As for Zen Stalker, Was a Zen Stalker in UEN, Character was transferred over to MG, like all the other characters were.

Thanks for reading my awful app :3

edit: Yes I removed the two skills I didn't get auth'd for, no reason leaving them up there as a reminder of how god-awful of a writer I am and how terrible my ideas are xD

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Wed Oct 02, 2013 8:11 pm

Willhelm wrote:-shrug-

Didn't think I wrote it out very well, to be honest, and Im totally fine with not getting armorer, or the hand to hand. Guns work equally fine as does buying my own gear. And OFC I ripped the M think from the front, are you saying You -cant- use the games / books to inspire ones stories?

Either way, Im fine with getting those revoked.

As for Zen Stalker, Was a Zen Stalker in UEN, Character was transferred over to MG, like all the other characters were.

Thanks for reading my awful app :3

edit: Yes I removed the two skills I didn't get auth'd for, no reason leaving them up there as a reminder of how god-awful of a writer I am and how terrible my ideas are xD
Well, you weren't denied... Me and Dax aren't in charge of application acceptions or denies, we just stated our opinions.

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Brendin65 on Wed Oct 02, 2013 10:20 pm

I'm leaving this to Forester... I'm very... |Soft when it comes to applications. I do how ever suggest that William be granted at least one of these three ASAS
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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Wed Oct 02, 2013 11:21 pm

I support that (even though the application part for it doesn't really support it) he should be given Experienced Marksman for his time on the surface.

And as far as ripping things off from the game goes.... I did borrow Khan's idea of putting a bayonet on my rifle. It's just so much more convenient in case you run out of ammo. :3

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Thu Oct 03, 2013 6:43 am

"Ripping things off" from the game/book is no problem at all.

Copying things is a problem.

The difference is, you take one thing to encourage and inspire you to make something of your own, something unique.

The other, you take it, barely change enough to make it your own, and use it. Like, I heard someone had used Khan's trick of prayer to pass through a room full of ghost's. That is terribly unimaginative and copied straight from the game/book without any change to make it your own, and also very, very, very, very, very, unlikely that anyone but Khan would know this trick. Other people I hear about making characters named and slightly, or majorly, formed to be characters they're named after. Most of them background characters, however, this makes no difference.

The point is to be unique. You can very well take as many pointers and ideas from the game/book as you want, but using what the book/game already has, with only changing slight things that wouldn't affect it's performance/appearance is not alright.

Copying is like quoting someone else, and putting your name on the quote. Whatever you want to call the other, is using the item/character from the book/game as a foundation, and building your own idea off of that.

When something too closely matches something from the book/game is when others get angry. The reason we chose the station we're at, and have the rules and regulations to stop such counterfeiting, is to keep our Metro unique. We don't want Metro 2033, because then everybody would be a main character. Main characters rarely die. No one wants to kill the character they've been working on for so long, but if they don't die and just gather vast wealth and firepower, they become "OP" and nobody like characters that think they're indestructible. You cannot live up to the standards of Artyom, because he had special events in his life that made him able to endure so much. Events that are one in a million. The other kids that were with him didn't even get that chance, because they ran off, remember? They didn't see the Dark One(s).

If I were you, I'd rewrite the application scenario. Try to add more killing of more difficult targets, while keeping in mind that your skill is the ability to use the weapon, not be badass and kill everything so quickly no one even gets a chance to respond. The point is your skill with the weapon, not the ability to kill quickly and efficiently. If you're out-gunned, flanked, or just plain outnumbered, this skill won't help with much if ten or twenty Nosalis are rushing from different directions, or even one, really. It won't help much if you have five or ten people spraying bullets in your direction. You could outmaneuver them, or outsmart them, but any person with common sense would not sit there, trying to aim down a sight, shooting at people, while being peppered with bullets. Remember, everyone is scared. Fear is natural. If you do not have fear, you are not human. Implement this in your RP.

I hope the above paragraph helps. I also hope the others help with everyone's idea of what copying is.

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

Post  Guest on Thu Oct 10, 2013 9:02 pm

Approved for experienced marksman, though this is probably far overdue.

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Re: Will / Wilhelm's Advanced Skill Application

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